What's With The Off-Color Joke He Sent Me?

I have met a darling man on the Internet. We have corresponded for 11 days. Numerous romantic cards have been sent, he has mailed me pictures of his family, and we seem to have a good match going. However, after not hearing from him for two days, I was quite surprised when he sent an off-color joke with no personal note added. Is he testing me to see if I'm a prude? Or is this his way of showing me he's changed his mind about our relationship? -- Sandra B., 68, Paris, Tennessee

Sandra: He’s likely testing you alright -- not to see if you’re a prude, but to let you know that he hopes you will be sexual with him. Sounds like he’s not as darling as you first thought and has ulterior motives. I’d let him know in no uncertain terms that if there is going to be a relationship, it’s going to be slow and easy at the beginning. I’ll bet you won’t hear from him after that. I could be wrong. Relationships that develop quickly when the two people have never met are iffy to begin with. Sounds like he’s a player. Be careful.

Tom Blake has written more than 600 newspaper columns on middle age dating and relationships. His "Single Again" column is featured in the Orange County (Calif.) Register. Tom is the author of two books: "Finding Love After 50: How to Begin. Where to Go. What to Do" and "Middle Aged and Dating Again." He has made multiple appearances as a keynote speaker at national AARP conventions and as a dating after 50 expert on the NBC show, Today. Sign up for Tom's free weekly "Finding Love After 50" e-letter, read previous columns or order books at findingloveafter50.com.

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